Archive for February 2nd, 2008

 Two blogs in one day? Christ on a cracker!  This one is VERY long and revealing (in fact it’s so long that I’ve only loaded some of it and left the rest as a downloadable file…feel free to skip it…that’s what those sidebar lists are there for).  Enjoy it while it lasts (or don’t…how do I know if you like this crap or not?)… 

Note: This post is inspired by Dead Baby Jokes’ ethical dilemma concerning a friend who is embarking on an affair but thinks it will make life with hubby better.  And, the fact that the rest of you are putting it all on the line and I’ve definitely been holding back (it’s my old-fashioned sense of propriety and nothing personal). 

M. and I met online through a personals website (Matchdoctor.com if you’re wondering).  We’re both older and had been around the block (if you include a German red light district in the block…M.’s contribution not mine).  And, we had both been in serious relationships which ended due to the other person’s infidelity.  We are not cheaters by nature.  

That being said…

Rest of Infidelity Post


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M. has the look of a 10yr old that just fell into the orangutan pit at the zoo and for good reason!  I’ve screamed at him three times in 30 minutes (a big change since I usually just glare at him like a pit bull when pissed).   

It started when he happily went about making breakfast and brought it to me in the recliner (jealous much? because you won’t be for long).  Ever had scrambled eggs without one iota of seasoning?  I’m not a big fan of eggs to begin with, but they’re the only things he really tries to make besides toast.  90% of the time I hate his eggs (he burns them, dries them out, or some other torture every time).  He started this back when we were dating on the weekends, and I haven’t the heart to stop him (besides then I’d have to cook).  But to hand a hungry and very recently caffeine-free woman perfect scrambled eggs to watch her lift them gently to her lips only to discover they don’t even have salt was just too damned much.  If I didn’t like my Target black and white damask print plates so much, I’d have thrown them at him! 

After reminding him that I’m out of tea (and the beauteous caffeine therein), he grabs a container of instant coffee and says “how about this?”  I’m loving my plates less and the idea of his face covered in egg more.  Cue dancing husband!  He dances around ideas trying to figure out what made you mad so that he can apologize and get out of it!  Let’s just say, M. needs tap lessons.  Finally, I gave him a clue that I was on to new madness and he could stop talking about eggs.  His eyes were like saucers as he tried to figure out what number to perform next.  Finally, he figured it out (caffeine = bad for fertility = mean wife).   

Then he did something right, he reminded me I had some fertility enhancing tea (Fertilitea) left.  Yay, tea!  I don’t think it’s the need for caffeine so much as the need to keep up my boring routine.  Tonight, I’m hitting the big W for some caffeine free tea and decaf instant coffee (for making homemade cappuccino), and we’ll see if I go ape shit tomorrow.  Pray for M.! 

P.S.- Yoohoo…Anybody out there?  Got any ideas on fertility-helping/caffeine-free drinks (hot or cold)?  

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