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Archive for February 14th, 2008

 Are you ready for this???  Tada!  

Valentines Day ‘08

Just when you think they’ll never learn.  When you think that there’s no hope of romance.  That those loving, lusting early days of your relationship are totally dead and buried and all you can do is just hold hands when you walk and learn to treasure the little things like his taking out the trash.  He does something like spend $2 on a heart-shaped box of candy and a card (did I pick the wrong day to give up sugar or what? oh well…tomorrow is another day).  I almost cried, seriously.    

Sure, we’ve had a little more cash lately, and Tina prompted him a little. (what are sisters for? poking and prodding husbands! that’s sisterly love that is.)  But M. actually went out and bought me something for Valentine’s Day.  I’m so…happily surprised.  Yep, that is definitely the phrase “happily surprised”.  I’m also deeply touched.    

M. does surprise me on occasion, or he used to surprise me.  I thought those days were long gone.  For one thing, in the past his gifts have been brought about mainly by brawls, and after our marital difficulties of the past year, I had assumed that we were past the gift-giving/get-outta-jail-free-card phase of marriage, and I saw it as a part of our relationship growing-up.  Of course the lack of money was a big part of that.  I had learned to hate his gifts because they so often came from arguments and it always felt like he was trying to buy my affection.  I can honestly say that if he had tried to buy his way out of his unfaithfulness I truly believe we would have divorced.  I just couldn’t have taken him trying to buy his way out of it.  (ok, now I am crying  

Instead, this little gift melts my heart and says to me that the worst is truly behind us.  No, it’s not the only time he’s surprised me.  It may not even be the absolute best ever surprise he’s given me. (just take a look below at the 3 dozen roses and teddy bear he sent me just before he came home from Iraq…the occasion?  just because…aaawww…I still remember the joy and how I couldn’t stop smiling…it’s the reason women long for unexpected romance)  But today, on this day of love, this little heart box and card are more than I could ever ask for.  

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P.S.- For those of you lamenting this day, please don’t.  Use it as a day for renewal and hope for your future.  Love is out there and as sappy (and somewhat horrific) as it sounds everything happens for a reason and in its own good time.  Try not to wallow in sadness (it seems to be the second national pastime on this day…and what’s it really going to do for you? add pounds and make you miserable?); instead open your eyes to the love around you even if it’s just a couple of birds sharing a crust of bread nearby. 

P.P.S.- Hug someone who needs it today!  It is the day reserved for love!   

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