Archive for April, 2009

to scare the crap out of you…


That’s right.  This is a second post in a week.  Don’t get too excited yet!  It’s a pre-scheduled post.  *sigh*  Thanks to Blogger/Blogspot being a pain on Tuesday, I’m pretty sure I got to read but not comment on everyone’s blog because of some freakin’ glitch.  So, if you’re on Blogger and got commented upon, it’s because a miracle occured or you had Haloscan comments.  😦  I’m tempted to comment here but that would be confusing at best what with all the babies about to pop and men being pains and fabulous camping trips, and other issues.  Instead, I got tagged by the lovely and talented Bitchy.  So here we go a meme-ing!


The rules: Answer the questions, make sure you mention who tagged you, and tag 8 of your blogger buddies.

8 Things that I am Looking forward to:

1. August!  Indy and I have birthdays that month and I’m hoping against hope that we have her on her birthday.
2. Spending an entire weekend with Paladin where we have nothing to do.  I have no idea when this fantasy weekend will ever occur, however.
3. Making my wedding dress!
4. A probable trip to Oregon at the end of July for both Paladin’s Family and 20th Class reunions.
5. Working from home!  I’m imagining my old routine:  wake up about 6am and walk the dog while puttering around my garden before coming inside to clean and care for my home (and Brian’s apartment).
6. Getting to spend more time with my Borrowed Girls.
7. Making Tina come help out on the weekends when we have the kids.

8. Starting the wedding planning in earnest.

8 Things I Did Yesterday:

1. Woke up at 4:30am (Paladin had to be evaluated at the VA and didn’t finish until 4pm).
2. Talked to Rachel in Missouri (she’s having a hard time…she had an epileptic seizure and isn’t allowed to drive now).
3. Nuked Michellina’s 4 Cheese Manicotti for breakfast/lunch (I love that stuff especially when I overcook it slightly)
4. Got an oil change in celebration of my divorce.
5. Looked at the cosmetics aisles and came out with 2 of the $1 lipsticks in a dark rose and a pale icy pink.
6. Walked into Mom’s and asked, “Who wants to kiss a pretty single gal?”
7. Was asked by the Brothers, “You know a pretty single gal?” (Paladin just agreed with them and laughed…I poked him!…they have just GOT to stop bonding).
8. Oh yeah, and I sat in a courtroom taking notes on where the hot guy lived that was getting divorced too (Tina obviously wasn’t paying attention…I think I’ve found a new way for her to meet men!).

8 Things I Wish I Could Do:

1. Publish the novel I finished 3 yrs ago.
2. Get off my ass and edit said novel.
3. Have Paladin whisk me away for a spur of the moment romantic weekend of wining and dining (fat chance…he ain’t the whisking type…he’s more the plan-6-months-in-advance type).
4. Get off my ass and start that t-shirt line that I’ve been talking about for years.
5. Watch Mull fall off the edge of the Grand Canyon (hey, it says “WISH”)
6. Start artificial insemination RIGHT NOW (and as long as I’m wishing, maybe the donor could be someone other than the Grandpa…ugghhh…).
7. See all my friends that are so far away.

8. Sleep for a week.

8 Shows I Watch:

1. Family Guy
2. King of the Hill
3. The Simpsons
4. American Dad (yeah, I know I could have just said Fox Sundays…getting the idea that I’m not watching a lot of tv lately?)
5. 6teen (don’t be judging me)
6. The Big Reveal (because I can see 3 HGTV shows in 30 minutes!)
7. Dollhouse (I’ve missed like half the episodes so far but every time I get to catch up it’s getting better)
8. Squidbillies (“I love you…I’ll kill you…”)

8 People I’m Tagging:

1. Beautiful Mess (not sure if you mind having your real first name mentioned anymore)
2. Teeni
3. Kat
4. Lola
5. Heather P.
6. KMommy
7. Vinomom
8. Steph (I’m not sure if you have enough bloggers to link to, hon…but I hope you’ll try!  🙂  )

I always try not to overlap bloggers.  To think, just the other day, I was thinking that maybe I’d gotten past the meme stage.  lol

 Beautiful BONUS:




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It took 3 days of waiting to get married and 15 minutes to say the vows.  It took 10 minutes to get divorced and nearly 7 months of waiting to get in front of the judge!  The lesson here?  LIVE WITH THE MAN FIRST! 


M. and I spent every free minute on the phone and he spent every weekend and an entire week living with me at my home before we were married, and it didn’t mean a danged thing.  I’ve never been a believer in living together before marriage.  I’m Suzanne Sugarbaker down to my toes on that one.  If you live with him without the ring, you have no legal protection.  And what am I doing right now?  Yep…  It began innocently enough.  When Paladin and I first began living together, it was just for a couple of days out of the week.  I was nervous about it even then, but it was only supposed to be for a month and a half and then we’d be secretly married.  Mull screwed that up.  Then the Army took a turn.  Paladin retired and we’ve been together nearly 24 hours a day for the last month.  That scared me.  I know that spending too much time together took a serious toll on my first marriage (course, that probably saved me a couple more years of torture…so it’s all good).  But you know what?  It’s been great.  We are always doing something and I won’t say that we don’t get on each other’s nerves occasionally, but we’ve been more lovey-dovey this week than we were when we first started living together.  I think I’ve found the one I was looking for all along, and I haven’t stopped thinking that despite hanging around Dave and Will this week.  They’ve been renovating the Deridder house, and bonding with Paladin.  I thought it was annoying when there were just two of them…now, there’s 3!  I even took a short video during the beginning of the build, but I’m so bright that I grabbed my camera when I headed out here to work and left my camera batteries in Deridder.  I so smart!  😀  I’m going to try to get it up on the blog before long especially since there is a really cute section where I got Pascal to do his “ready to go outside?” tricks.


Yesterday, after court, I went to Walmart to get my oil changed.  When I celebrate, I celebrate.  😉  I spent the entire time smiling and wanting to spin around and throw a hat in the air.  😀  I’m still giggly.  And as a bonus, M. is now in Natchitoches in what Tina describes to me as a small crack house.  W00t!  There was really only one aggravation the entire day. 


Tina told me that M.’s mother had the nerve to tell him, “It’s about time you got away from that b**ch!”  Ummm…say what lady?  YOU are talking about ME?  This from a woman that sloughed that scum out your whoha the day after your own birthday and STILL forgot to even send him an E-CARD while he was in Iraq?  Puhlease…  That ticked me off and yeah, it still does.  For the first 4 months of our separation, I paid all the bills and didn’t take a dime from M. so that he could afford to get a job and move out.  Instead, he put up ONE online application and sat on his butt using all his money to try to find a new sugar mama.  It wasn’t until I was going to have him forcibly removed by the cops that he called up his unit so that they could throw some school money and temporary jobs at him.  Even then, my family drove him around and helped him out.  We’ve kept him alive.  Hell, I had to FORCE him to call his mother when his grandfather was in the hospital about to die at Christmas!  He’s a gigantic, self-centered JERK.  Live with it lady!  You created him.  Not me.  She’s just scared that he’ll end up on her doorstep again.  What are the chances that he can find a second woman halfway across the country that his mother can ship him to?  The first time he got out of the Army his mother gave him airfare from New York to Arkansas to get rid of him.  He ended up homeless for weeks until someone took pity on him and helped him get a job where he could live on the job site.  This is who he is.  I’m sorry, ex-MIL, but that’s just life.  Let’s not pretend he’s a great war hero who just meets the wrong women.  Cuz that’s a crock ‘o bull!  She should just be thankful that he’s got another 4 yrs. in the Louisiana National Guard before he can really leave the state (you’re welcome, btw!…that’s yet another thing I forced him to do…I’m willing to bet that he isn’t bright enough to sign on for another 2 yrs. after that so that he can get a retirement pension…he’s just that lazy).  If I were her, I’d start getting the futon ready for him now. 


Hmmm…that totally turned into a rant, didn’t it?  Ehhh…I’m still stoked!  😀  I’m rambling.  But I’m stoked!  I so wanted to get pics and videos up though.  Dang it!  And here at work, there’s no cable and the only entertainment is online.  And since Brian is asleep, there’s a better than average chance that if the rain holds off, I’ll be commenting on your blog today!  Yay! 


An even bigger bonus?  One of the best female lead television moments of all time:


Laters, ya’ll!


P.S.- It’s started raining.  I’ve got internet up but it’s spotty.  I’ve only been able to comment on one blog and it’s a WordPress blog.  Danged Blogger keeps going screwy.  Blogger is too damned finicky!  And apparently, Blogspot is basically Blogger in a tutu.  Grrr….

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Me:   Who’s there?

Indy:  Indy!  *giggle*

lol That’s what a fair amount of my weekend sounded like.  🙂  I love that little Indy thinks I’m her joined-at-the-hip playmate, but I think I’ll enjoy it more when she understands how the knock-knock joke works.  lol


I haven’t posted because things have been far too insane. 


Last week, Dave, Paladin and I took Brian to town to arrange for deferments for several of his payments because of the cut in his VA benefits which began immediately despite the letter the VA sent stating that it wouldn’t start until June.  When we brought Brian home, we discovered that the Sheriff’s department was looking for Manjina and had 2 warrants out for him stemming from unpaid child support.  As we were getting ready to leave for the day, Manjina called from the jail.  Earlier that morning, I had told his on-again, off-again girlfriend where he would be, and Brian, who doesn’t care for her much, automatically assumed she had tipped off the cops.  Brian’s stepbrother, current owner of Brian’s residence, made it clear that Manjina would not be allowed back in the residence, and by the next day his stepbrother began clearing out the property.  The day before this happened Brian had asked me about Paladin’s offer to have him move in with us, and I assured him that it was still on the table.  After Manjina’s incarceration, Brian has decided to go ahead and take us up on our offer.  So, this week we will be starting the renovations to make our home handicap accessible.  In the middle of all of this, my head supervisor out of Shreveport came through to go over Brian’s Plan of Care and we explained the situation to her; she assured us that its not a problem for Brian to live with us and that my job will not be affected. 


As for who tipped off the po-po, Manjina’s girlfriend has been pulling every string she can to try to get him out, and at one point Brian turned to me and said, “I don’t know if it’s love, but she’s killing herself working for him.”  I reminded him that I like her.  She’s a hard worker and a go-getter and she pushes Manjina to do what he needs to do.  She’s a good woman.  As for the tipster…my bet is on Mar.  I think Mar thought it would be the prime opportunity for her to worm her way in here.  Her reaction to the “surprising news” was also very suspicious as in she wasn’t surprised at all and seemed to be fishing to see if anyone knew how they’d found Manjina.  Hmmm…  I’m guessing it’s killing her that Brian will be moving far away from here.  Or should that be “far away from her”?


So, probably before June 1st, I will be living at the Deridder house full-time.  The good news about that is I will be able to be online a lot more!  w00t!  I seriously miss being here, and I miss it even more now that more than half of my local girlfriends have left Ft. Polk.  It’s unfortunate, but it’s the nature of living near an Army base.  😦  Girl’s Night hadn’t been the same since the men had come back from Iraq, but at least we still got to see each other.  Now, nearly all of them have been reassigned to different bases around the world.  Our last Girl’s Night was poorly attended, but I was really there to see Rachel and the kids before they left for Missouri.  We spent over an hour in the parking lot hugging and laughing.  Dave and Will came by while we were outside and Rachel had to go joke with them for about 20 minutes.  I guess I’m going to have to get over my aversion to using my Facebook and Myspace accounts because like many young people that’s Rachel’s favorite way of staying in touch.  *sigh*  And, yeah, I know I sounded totally old saying that.  *crotchety old lady voice*  You little whipper-snappers get off my lawn!


I truly appreciate your suggestions concerning our custody issues.  I took them to heart and have spent two days going over my personal correspondence and the blog in order to piece together a log of our custody issues.  Of course, this was partially spurred by more ugliness over the weekend.


We had a lot of things happen over the last week and over the weekend with Mull.  After she kept the children from going to the zoo with us, we decided to keep the children over Spring Break but only on our terms.  As it turned out, she refused any contact with us over Spring Break. 


By Thursday night, Paladin prepared for war and when he contacted Mull to pick the kids up for his regular visitation, he was prepared to tell her that if she tried to prevent his visitation that the police would become involved.  Fortunately, Mull eagerly agreed to the schedule and he didn’t have to make that threat.  I’m guessing that hanging out with five kids wasn’t her boyfriend’s idea of a good vacation especially since he turned 26 on that Friday according to the kids (Mull is 35).  Hey, I guess even a blind guy notices five kids after spending a week with them.  Can’t keep them quiet forever.  The duct tape glue wears loose.


Friday night was pretty quiet really.  Blondie had a headache, but she recovered after a small dose of children’s ibuprofen was put down her.  We blindfolded Bell and brought her into her party room (soon to be Brian’s studio) to give her our family gifts while Tina, Dave, and Will were there.  She got a ton of Goth accessories from Tina & my family, a glam Goth bracelet from me, and a tiger print mini-skirt from Paladin along with a pair of shoes to replace her extremely worn-out favorite flats.  She loved it all and the room.  I had taken the blue Christmas lights I had bought for the wedding (50 cents each at after Christmas sales…I’m planning to use them to light the trees in the back yard for that fairy effect) and lined the entire room in them.  I took one set and wrote her name on one wall in lights.  We borrowed Brian’s 32 inch flat screen tv for the party which turned out to be a great blessing.  The original party was meant to be a “water” party because they had so much fun playing with the water balloons at the BBQ that Bell wanted to do that for her birthday too.  But it POURED the rain all weekend long.  Instead, I had about a dozen Goth kids in one room.  When we weren’t looking they went out and ran in the rain.  When we got them back inside they played Twister and then watched bad horror flicks (“American Zombie”, I want that hour of my life back!).  It was probably all for the best because I ended up being the party overseer all by myself. 


Before the party, Savvy complained of an earache twice.  I was pretty sure she was just seeking attention, but to be safe I insisted she take some ibuprofen and lie down.  When she didn’t make too much of a fuss about it, I figured it was better to be safe than sorry.  I told Paladin to take her to the ER and I’d hold down the fort.  He got back just before the party ended.  As it turned out, she did not have an ear infection.  It’s likely that she agreed to lie down because she relishes the extra attention.  But, the doctor did say she had an upper respiratory infection (aka a common cold) and possible allergies and the doc prescribed Motrin and a nasal spray but decided that an anti-biotic wasn’t necessary. 


As usual, we learned a lot of little tidbits from the kids.  Bell told us that Blondie and Savvy have both begun wetting the bed at Mull’s, but we’ve been checking their beds and they’re staying dry here.  That seriously worries me.  Bed wetting can be a sign of anxiety in young children.  But, I also wouldn’t be surprised if there was some sleep apnea involved because these children snore loudly.  Still, it doesn’t explain why they are bed wetting at home and not here.


Then, while making pancakes for breakfast on Saturday, Blondie piped up and said, “Mom never makes us breakfast!”  They had been at home all week for Spring Break and I asked them what they’d been eating.  They told me they “put peanut butter on bread” and Blondie said “I get salami out of the fridge.”  Ask me how pissed I was!  All five of these children have had a hot breakfast EVERY single day they have been with us at the Deridder house except ONE morning when they asked for some of my cold cereal.   So I said, “But Mom gets up and takes care of you right?”  Blondie and Savvy were both answering back and forth and it went something like this:  “Mom is sleepy.”  “Bell is supposed to take care of us.”  So I asked them, “What about Indy?”  They told me that Indy doesn’t sleep in Mom’s room anymore; she sleeps in the living room or in their bed.  So I said, “But what about when you go to school?”  They answered that “Mom leaves her door open so she can hear Indy.”  If I was pissed before, just guess what I was thinking by the end of that conversation!  This kind of stuff kept coming up all weekend and HELL YES I MADE NOTES!  We knew Bell was bearing the brunt of the parenting at Mull’s but we had no idea how much.  The next morning I was talking about Indy’s need to be potty trained (she’s beyond ready…she tells you when she needs to go and gets on the toilet by herself) when Bell told me that Mull has been having Indy wear the panties I sent home with them but she’s doing it to save diaper money.  Then Bell complained, “but then I have to take her to the bathroom every few minutes.”  Not much of a life for a 16 yr. old.  I too was a parent figure at that age, and although I took a lot of pride in it, I also didn’t have to care for 3 kids under the age of 8.


Things just seem to be quickly going down hill with Mull.  The girl’s new underwear is still missing a MONTH after I sent them home with them and Mull just says she doesn’t know where they are and they’re still showing up with the same 3 pair of stained underwear they’ve been wearing for the last 6 months.  Four months after she first mentioned it, Savvy’s hearing aids still have not been fixed, and it’s a Tricare service; it doesn’t cost her a single DIME!  Poor Savvy keeps showing us her cavity, which is getting much deeper, and asking us to make a dentist appointment for her, and when we talk to Mull about it, she says, “It’s costs too much.”  When Paladin offers to pay the co-pay for it (about $150 according to Mull…Savvy also pointed to the new NintendoDSi commercial and told me that “Mom has that”…Walmart.com has the game for $199…I guess her toy is more important than Savvy gumming her food), she counters with, “It takes months to get an appointment.”  Bull!  Pure BULL!  I called the dentist’s office myself yesterday and they had appointments for after-school for 3 days this week and assured me that they didn’t have to hold treatment for Tricare participants.  I knew that before I called the dentist (so does Mull…she’s used them before), but I wanted to double check and to make a note of it in the Custody Log.  Mull also sent Savvy back with her Easter dress shoes because according to Savvy, “Mom says they’re too big and they look ugly with socks.”  So Savvy wasn’t allowed to wear her shoes with her Easter dress, and since I haven’t seen these kids in a single dress shoe, I’m guessing she went in her dirty sneakers.  For the record, when Savvy tried the shoes on they were a bit loose, but the smaller size was too tight and since I’d just bought her new socks I had told her she could wear them with the socks.  Martian has his own issues and Saturday he had to be forced to take a bath (he admitted that he hadn’t had a shower since Wednesday) and later that weekend he mentioned to Paladin that Mull had used a “wooden spoon” in regards to discipline but we never got the full story.  Frankly, things just got deeper as if a bad mothering hurricane was tearing through this week.


Saturday morning while I was cleaning up breakfast, Paladin and I found out that the little girls didn’t know about the divorce.  I guess telling your kids something like that just isn’t necessary in Mull’s book.  So we spent about 5 minutes explaining what it was and that it wasn’t a big deal and that nothing was changing from the way it was right now.  It didn’t seem to phase them at all and I was glad of that.  All they’ve been saying for months is that “Dad left” and I constantly correct them.  When asked, they know that “Mom took us to the hotel.”  I really HATE that Mull tells these kids that their father left them when it is the most untrue thing in the world.  He’s done everything he could to be there for them all along including asking Mull to come back knowing she was pregnant with yet another child that wasn’t his.


Just when I thought the day couldn’t get any longer, Saturday, after Bell’s party, we put the Borrowed Girls to bed in their room.  Begin the saga!  It’s been going the same way at least one night out of every visit for the last 2 months:  Savvy goes to sleep with no trouble at all.  About 1am, Savvy starts coming into our room and continues to do so every hour for the rest of the night until I give up and sit in her bedroom and make her keep her head on her pillow.  After that, she’s dead to the world.  So, it’s not that she’s not sleepy; she just seems to wake up and wants to be up wandering around.  I thought maybe she was afraid of the dark, and she has used that as an excuse but she has a different reason for wanting to be up every time.  To cut her off at the pass, we had put up blinds with curtains over top of them, we’d put in a nightlight (which was useless because there’s so much light from the porch and street light that you can barely see it), and we’d given Savvy a flashlight.  All of it was useless.  The next morning I found out why.  Bell told us that Savvy has been doing this at Mull’s too.  She goes into Mull’s room and Mull tells her to go get in bed with Bell (we make her stay in her own bed).  According to Bell, when Savvy goes to school she tells the teachers that she’s ‘sick’ but what she really means is that she’s sleepy.  Because of school policy, they send Savvy home and Mull let’s her sleep on the sofa.  Bell says that this has become a habit with them.  Because Savvy is being counted at attendance in the morning, she’s not on the absent rolls, but she is missing school.  So, later this week (Paladin has appointments today and tomorrow), Paladin is going to stop by their schools and find out the in’s and out’s of what’s going on with ALL of the school-age children (we already know that Marvin has missed all the school days that he can).  Mother of the year, I tell ya…


Sunday wasn’t that bad.  I put Savvy on punishment because during her night tirade she had woke both Blondie and Indy by screaming that she didn’t want to stay in bed and had taken apart Indy’s sippy cup.  I made her write 30 lines saying “I will stay in my bed all night and I will not wake up other people at night”, and I wouldn’t let her play on the computer at all.  When she complained, I told her that the punishment was for our house and that she could ask Mom if she could play on the computer when she got back to Mull’s trailer park.  She replied, “But Mom’s always on the computer; she doesn’t let us use it.”  Boy, that picture just keeps getting clearer, don’t it?


I wouldn’t bank on Mull being off the computer any time soon, Savvy.  When Mull showed up to pick the kids up on Sunday evening, she pulled out the b**ch fit card.  Paladin came inside all flustered asking me about these imitation-Lego blocks that Mull sends with the kids sometimes.  I told him that they hadn’t brought them.  He looked anyhow, but they just weren’t there.  He went out and told Mull that if we found them, that we’d bring them to her.  Mull told him that she wanted those blocks and she wasn’t leaving until she got them.  He came back to look again, and I started getting hot under the damned collar let me tell ya.  Like I’m hiding children’s blocks!  That’s right!  I plan to retire on selling used $20 bags of imitation Legos, b**ch!  He looked again and still no blocks.  This time when he went out she made the teenagers get out of the van to go look for them.  I stayed in the house because if I’d went outside I’d have a cut a b**ch fo sho!  I sent him outside and told him to go take up the laundry list of crap she needed to address (all that stuff up top there) and I’d help the teens look.  Sanjaya2 was with them and he said, “She seems to have had a really bad day today.”  That’s about the nastiest thing that boy has probably EVER said in his life; he’s that sweet.  I replied, “I’ll bet.”  By the time, the kids came back out, she was more than ready to leave because she ducks any discussion of her parenting like Willie Nelson tries to outrun the IRS.  The long and short of the block epic is that 20 minutes later when Paladin called the kids had found them sitting in their bedroom the entire time.  Hand to God, if I’d went outside, the cops would have been called.  I wanted to call them immediately but Paladin doesn’t want to have to go there until there’s no other choice. 


My best guess on Mull’s meltdown?  I’m guessing that a week spent with five kids in a trailer makes it very clear to a 26 yr. old blind guy that EVEN HE CAN DO BETTER.  Since she drives him back to college every Sunday before she picks up the kids, I’m guessing that Mull and Jeremy either fought or broke up.  I hope for his sake it was the latter.  Either way, I’m guessing she will be online hunting for another baby daddy line up this week.  Mull likes to hedge her bets.  In her line of work, you have to.


At any rate, that’s my life of the past week or so.  Crazy.  Just pure crazy.  Tomorrow night, we’re sending the Custody Log to Paladin’s Dad who works in child support enforcement in Oregon.  I don’t know if all of this stuff is enough to get Child Services involved, and we want his opinion and that of his contacts.  We’re also taking copies of it into Paladin’s lawyer and pushing him to get off his ass or we’re going to have to get a new ambulance chaser.  We also have to start the renovations on Thursday.  It’s all too complicated and it barely leaves me enough time to scratch my ass much less get online.  I have pics waiting to be posted, but I have to get my software reloaded on the computer at work.  We’ll see how much of a slave driver Paladin is this weekend.  Maybe I’ll get to be online at home!  🙂


*sigh*  Try not to forget me.  I won’t forget you.  I’ll be around when I can and in a few weeks, we’ll be together again.  😉


P.S.- Maricel, point taken.  I haven’t updated my About Me page and I so totally have put that on the list.  Of course it’s number 195 on the list.  So, it may be a while…

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I haven’t posted in a week, but not for lack of trying.  There has been A LOT happening on ALL fronts.  But, I’ll start with the easy stuff.  The day after I wrote that last post I got online at work to catch up with all of you.  I got halfway through my blogroll when the boss sent me off to town.  The next day when I got to work Manjina told me my computer had another virus.  Boy, he did it right that time!  This virus wouldn’t let you online at all and you couldn’t even run any anti-virus or anti-spyware programs.  I had no choice but to wipe the entire hard drive.   Yeah, that’s about as much fun as it sounds.  It took 2 work days for me to wipe the drive and reload the basic programs.  I haven’t even put MS Word or Picasa back on it yet.  I’m not even going to load Yahoo Messenger because I’m pretty sure that’s how he got the virus in the first place.  His Yahoo accounts have been getting hijacked for months with the hijacker changing his password and sending out messages as him.  Going by the messages, it’s obviously a vindictive ex-girlfriend or someone related to them.  I tell ya.  Here’s a clue Manny.  STOP HANDING OUT YOUR PASSWORD LIKE IT’S CANDY!  And how about you don’t add everything with a female name that asks to be added?  Not so hard really.  At any rate, if you thought I just didn’t care or skipped your blog intentionally, SO NOT TRUE.  Somewhere in the middle of all of this, there was a kids weekend, my relatives came, Rachel got her PCS orders, and Tina had a minor celebrity sighting.  So let’s hit this…


When Mull dropped the kids off on Friday, she and Paladin got into it over me.  It started innocently enough.  She sent them with a ton of craft stuff for the weekend.  When they came through the door, Blondie was gushing over it telling me how “Mom said we can do this here.”  I told her in my smiling, sweet, not-on-your-life voice, “Nope.  You can do that at Mom’s.  I have stuff to do this weekend.”  Mull was still outside giving Paladin a schedule for Spring Break (but I’ll get into that later).  So, Martian took the stuff back out to her.  Mull flipped.  She told Paladin, “She can’t tell my kids what they can and can’t do.”  I was inside with the little ones and oblivious to all of this, btw.  Paladin told her that I was none of her business and Mull told him she’d ask her lawyer about that. Paladin told her that was fine that he wondered just what the judge would have to say about her selling babies.  As I said, I was inside the house and had no idea this was going on.   Bell came inside and was obviously upset.  I asked her what was wrong, and she said she didn’t know if she should tell me.  I told her, “In this house, we have no secrets” and took her to the bedroom to talk.  She told me about the fight going on outside.  I told her that Dad and Mom were wrong to fight in front of her and Martian.  She was having trouble explaining how she was feeling, and I told her that I knew she felt caught in the middle and that she didn’t have to be.  I told her that it’s the adult’s responsibility and she’s a teenager and that anytime she felt caught in the middle she could come to me.  We hugged.  It was totally a bonding moment and she felt better.  When Paladin came inside I dragged him into the bedroom alone to find out what was going on.  He hadn’t known that Bell or Martian could hear them.  I left the room and sent in Bell and Martian so Paladin could talk to them and apologize.  And, the rest of the weekend went off without a hitch except for some arguing between Paladin and I.  I always get stressed when pulling off a big to-do.  I try to do everything myself (in this case, that meant redecorating a courtyard and porch and cooking for 30…all in 2 days…I’ll have decor pics soon!) until I can’t and then I hand off a few jobs.  Paladin wanted to go put a bracket over his license plate.  Yeah, way more important than fixing the grill and getting out the cooler.  So, yeah we got into it, but we got over it…as soon as he saw the light…  I told him if he thought this was rough, he should see how I get when the wedding comes.


Sunday, we planned a BBQ and invited my relatives and all of my girlfriends (I told Rachel to forward an email to them but most of them didn’t show up…not sure if Rachel was lax or what…this has happened before with her…she shows up with one or two people in her car and that’s it…I’m starting to wonder if it’s intentional friend-hoarding or coincidence).  We didn’t tell the kids this until the day of the BBQ because every time we have made a specific plan and told them about it something has ruined it.  They all had a blast!  Paladin got water balloons, and although I missed most of it because I was making sure everyone got fed, I hear that they got several of my cousins GOOD.  lol  My relatives all loved the kids and fawned over them.  Savvy got her hair french-braided by my aunt and was over the moon about it.  Rachel showed up with her 3yr. old Naudia and with Girl’s Night regular Clara and her little 4yr. old Junior (how I wish I’d given someone a camera while I was running around making strawberry margaritas and telling Bell that “I don’t care if your mother lets you make her pina coladas and drink with her.  It’s not happening here.”).  Naudia and Indy are about the same age, and Junior and my cousin’s little boy Christian are the same age.  So, the kids had built-in buddies.   The boys did great and were in cahoots in 10 seconds.  But, Naudia has me worried.  She wouldn’t play with the other children (she is shy with most people but she’s been in daycare with other kids for months) and when you put her next to Indy you can tell that they are on two different developmental tracks entirely.  Naudia’s language skills are stunted to some extent and Rachel has already spoken to a speech therapist because of it.  I’m very worried about it.  Sometimes you really don’t see how significant it is until you see them with other children.  I’ve been around this child more than her own father (thanks to deployments) and on this Monday, they will be leaving for Missouri.  I’m going to miss them so very much.  😦  Anyhoo, the party was still in full swing when Indy informed me that she had pooped.  We headed inside for a diaper change and Mull showed up halfway through (who keeps feeding this kid curry?  seriously, she could peel paint off the walls!).  I told Martian we’d be out once it was done.  When we came out I almost had to force Indy to go because she wanted to keep playing outside.  I’m sure that helped Mull’s mood.  Eventually, the party wound down and we headed out to my Mom’s.


The majority of the week was spent at work trying to repair things.  First, I worked on my computer.  Then Brian told me that he had gotten a letter from the VA telling him that he owed them almost $17 grand!  Needless to say, we spent a day at the VA trying to get somewhere with that.  It comes down to additional medical expenses, such as OTC meds and transportation costs, that the VA has been giving him a monthly stipend for, but that Brian didn’t claim (it was determined before Tina’s time and we suspect that a previous worker filled out the form and padded it…but the Hispanic Morgan Freeman voice on the other end of the line would only say it was “data” they had on file).  They are going to dock his pay by over $500 a month.  Brian thinks it will all be ok, but things have been tight since Mr. Ralph died and he had to take over all the bills alone.  The other day before Paladin and I left Brian asked if the offer to move into the West Wing still stood.  Of course, it does.  Not a problem.  We’ll be happy to have him as a tenant. 


I did take off for most of Tuesday and Paladin and I joined the family on a trek through Natchitoches.  Paladin had never been and we hit all of the same places we’d gone with Ginger last summer including St. Augustine Catholic Church (the wedding ceremony of Steel Magnolia’s was filmed there), Oakland Plantation (it’s undergoing renovations but they’ve opened far more of it since last summer), and Magnolia Plantation (it was deserted and not even the caretaker was there…last year we had a ghostly encounter there that scared the bejesus out of Ginger 🙂 ).  Then we went to lunch at The Landing restaurant on Front Street where the food is ok but you really pay for the ambiance (I prefer Merci Beaucoup around the corner); the bread pudding always makes me forget the cost though.  Paladin and I avoided most of the shops and just strolled along the river front talking about how what might have been.  If Mull hadn’t screwed up filing the divorce, we’d have been in Natchitoches secretly getting married that weekend (I mentioned that to Mom when we got home and she flipped…apparently, I forgot to tell her about our interrupted secret elopement plans).  We ended the day out at the Bayou Pierre Alligator Park.  Unfortunately, it was still a bit cool out and alligators don’t like that, but the baby goats were ADORABLE!  I used every quarter I could lay my hands on to feed them!  Paladin was hanging around talking guy stuff with my Uncle Rob.  Paladin fits in with all the relatives just like he’s one of us already (the brothers even like him…he hangs out and drinks coffee and argues politics and speaks guns & ammo…like I said, he fits right in!  lol ).  On the way out of the park, Tina stopped the owner to tell him how much she enjoyed watching him on A&E’s The Exterminators and she told him about her minor-celebrity sighting.  Last Saturday, she was in Walmart when the brother on the Exterminators, Ricky, asked her if he could get past her.  She went totally ‘OMG!  A celebrity!’ stunned and stuttered, “Sure, Ricky.”  Then Ricky looked stunned.  I’m pretty sure it was the first time he had been a celeb-sighting.  It made Tina’s year.  It was a good quiet day, and I went home with White Russian and Irish Coffee truffles from Front Street’s Les Saisson candy shop. 


In fact, everything was quiet until Thursday evening when Paladin and I got into a major fight.  He has a bad habit of telling the kids everything about our plans which is the same as telling Mull.  Martian called him Thursday evening and asked what we were doing and he told him about the zoo, stopping at Mom’s for painting (weekend before last, I let Savvy and Indy talk to Mom on the phone and Blondie has been asking about her too…Indy threw a major fit the other day wanting to talk to “mom” on the phone…Paladin thought she meant Mull and I had to explain to him that she meant my Mom…this would have been their first time to meet my Mom in person but they’ve met the brothers and Tina a few times) and bowling on base with the Girl’s Night crowd.  I screamed at Paladin over that and told him that we’d never see them now.  He argued back at me because I’m too controlling and have to have my way and he’s not going to lie to his kids.  I told him, “This is who I am and you’d better figure out now if you can handle it; if you can’t, it’s best to leave now.”  He walked out of the ghetto trailer and came back a while later.  We talked it through but nothing was really settled.  I took the argument harder than he did.  He thought of it as a little spat.  I spent the rest of the night driving back to Deridder with him quietly thinking about whether or not he could handle life with me.  I’m under no illusions.  I KNOW I’m controlling and I take my life and everything I do seriously, but I haven’t changed in 20yrs.  I wouldn’t hold my breath on things changing anytime soon.  Paladin tried to get me to talk about it by the time we stopped at Walmart for gas (people don’t really appreciate you sitting in the van for half an hour talking while they wait to fill up, btw).  He finally realized that he’s not the only one with abandonment issues.  I may handle mine better, but they’re still here sitting beside my ‘second class citizen’ issues having coffee and talking shite.  My issues didn’t even get a chance to cool down when Paladin pulled out the forgotten Spring Break schedule Mull provided.  He had forgotten to show it to me until that moment.  I flipped a bit.  Mull’s schedule was basically her taking the kids to the zoo Saturday and to Church Sunday then immediately leaving them with us after Church for most of the rest of the week.  Gee…I wonder if college students get the same Spring Break.   They do?  Why, really?  By morning I was still steamed at Paladin despite his hugging me tight in bed and telling me how much he loves me (that doesn’t keep me from being mad about suddenly having to work out my work schedule so that I can work, take care of the kids, and be with you week-after-next when you have to be in the hospital for 2 days).  Mostly, I was pissed because I’d been looking forward to sleeping past 6am for the first time in a month, to having a single day when I didn’t have to clean or take care of a million other things.  I wasn’t mad at him for long though.


When Paladin called at 8am to make sure the kids were up and getting ready for our day out, Mull informed him that they couldn’t go because they were sick.  Uh huh.  After I’d told Paladin “told ya so”, I suggested he roll on over there and see just how sick they were.   The answer?  Probably not at all.  According to Mull on the phone, Savvy was throwing up all night and Indy was sick and had a fever.  When Paladin got there, they were gone.  Mull soon arrived with all the kids in her mini-van dressed and ready to be left with us; she wanted us to leave Bell at home alone with Indy and Savvy and take the “healthy” kids to the zoo (that leaves Martian and Blondie, btw).  That would never under ANY circumstances have happened; at most, one of us would have stayed with them and Bell would have gone with the rest of the kids.  It’s not Bell’s job to take care of a sick 2.5yr. old and 8yr. old!  She’s only 15!  Dammit, Mull, be a mother or step aside and let a grown up do it!  Of course, sick is a very relative term.  Paladin quickly found out that Savvy had thrown up once the night before and she was hanging on him begging to go to the zoo as perky as ever.  Indy was kept out of his reach; so that he couldn’t touch her to check her “fever” but she didn’t do her usual sick kid thing (she wasn’t listless or glassy-eyed or cuddling up…and believe me, we know what she looks like sick…Mull has sent her to us sick MANY times).  Paladin informed Mull that her ploy wasn’t going to work.  If the kids were really sick, she needed to either stay home and take care of them herself or take them to the ER on base (it costs her nothing but time to take them there).  She told him that just maybe the kids would be sick the next time he was supposed to have them too.  He told her that if she couldn’t take care of her responsibilities that a judge could make sure she did.  Mull has sent those kids to us about 4 times in 5 months with illnesses and has yet to have taken any of them but Martian to the doctor (she only took him because he’s missed so much school that if he didn’t have a doctor’s excuse they’d fail him).  Savvy keeps telling us about her cavity and that “Mom says she can’t afford to take me to the dentist”; Paladin has offered several times now to pay the co-pay for the dentist (as he did for Bell to get her braces and he pays to keep the dental insurance which is an extra charge in the Army system) and Mull just got almost $5k in tax money and another big pay-off from the adoption.  She can afford it.  She just doesn’t want to.  She wanted to make sure she ruined our day out and to get her way.  Paladin told her that wasn’t going to fly.  He came home without the kids because of it.  Bell texted him telling him that it was unfair to not do it Mom’s way because that way at least some of the kids could go and instead now they’d be in the ER for hours; he texted back telling her not to do her mother’s talking for her (Mull makes Bell and Martian talk to Paladin for her despite the fact that we’ve told her time and again to do her own calling…it’s not like Paladin attacks her or anything…it’s called being an adult).  What else was he supposed to do?  If we had taken these obviously-not-sick kids to the zoo as planned, Mull would have reamed us over it and she’d probably have done the same if we’d left Bell to take of them (as if  we’d do that!).  In the end, we’ve pretty much decided not to make Mull’s life easier by taking the kids for most of Spring Break.  We want them here.  We do.  But, Mull can’t have it her way all the time.  She doesn’t get to tell us how to spend our time with them.  Period.  And, I, for one, really don’t feel the need to take care of the kids so she can spend romantic weeks with her college student especially if it’s on her terms.  The Wednesday before this, Paladin talked to his attorney about equal custody, and the lawyer said he could file for it but it’s going to take time.  His lawyer isn’t the greatest and seems to be juggling a lot of clients.  I told Paladin that he’d just have to be the squeaky wheel.  We haven’t been formally documenting Mull’s activities or hunting her down or making notes about her men, but it looks like it may be coming to that.  *sigh*


So that’s been my week in a nutshell.  I’m going to try to get to your blogs tomorrow since I’ll have my Sunday free, I guess.  I hope you haven’t all disappeared.  😦  Right now, I’ve got to water my neglected garden, check out the very needy cat, and go to the last Girl’s Night.  😦  Byes!

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Can I write a post in 6 minutes?  Let’s see…

Congratulate me!  Wednesday my divorce papers were filed!  I’d been hoping to get it finalized on April Fool’s Day, but it took too long to get in to see the lawyer.  M. started to give me grief about it, but it’s done.  The only way he can stop it from being final in the next few weeks is to hire his own lawyer and fight it.  He ain’t got the cahoneys.  Paladin was nearby when he started his whole “don’t I get a say in this?” schtick.  Paladin didn’t interfere, but when I came out of the room with M. I could see that Paladin was on high alert.  I don’t think I’ll ever get the M.P. out of him, but, heck, sometimes it comes in handy.  And it’s sweet that he’s like a bulldog when he’s protecting his own.  🙂


Mull tried to give us grief because we asked for an extra day with the kids while my cousins are here.  We’re planning to take them to the zoo and bowling and make a really long day of it.  And, yes, I told the kids that when we had them over the weekend while Paladin was outside clearing it with Mull.  She was fine and dandy with it.  Then, when he called to remind her and set up the timing for it, she claimed she was already taking them to the zoo.  Sure you were…about 10 seconds after they told you we were taking them.  Whatever.  We talked it over and told her it was fine that we’d still take them early on Friday morning.  I promised them the zoo.  The zoo is what they get.  I doubt they’ll complain if they go twice.  This coming week, Paladin has made an appointment with his lawyer to talk about equal custody.  I doubt we could get full custody, but he’s certainly in as good a position as her to have equal custody.  I don’t know how all this works but I’m hoping that it also lowers her child support.  I know that sounds cruel of me, but I think that cutting her financial legs may be the only way to get her to see her life for what it is.  Child support is meant to take care of the kids and not so you can bring in man after man to f**k with the kids in the next room.  There for a while I actually was beginning to feel sorry for her.  After the crap she’s been pulling lately…not so much.  All she has to do is straighten up her act, pay attention to her kids, and keep her whoring on the down-low instead of right in the house with them.  I don’t think that’s so much to ask.  If she can’t, I’m more than willing to make her life less comfortable.  As I told Paladin, I don’t really care that she’s from a foreign country and has no marketable skills to speak of.  They get Oprah everywhere!  She did this same thing in her own country.  Children are not cash cows.  They are a responsibility and a treasure (as sappy as that sounds).  As far as we can tell, she gets up in the morning and makes sure they leave for school (chances are Bell is the one actually getting them ready).  She tells them to pick up their room when they come home.  That’s it.  Martian does the cooking and he and Bell do the cleaning.  Mull goes to bed about 8 or 9 and doesn’t even put them to bed.  How many mothers would love to be able to get away with a set up like that?  Do a load of laundry, change 2 or 3 diapers, throw a banana at the baby and call it a day.  That’s if the oldest kids aren’t there to do that for her too.  Hell, I don’t get to bed at 9 o’clock at night and all I’ve got is a dog and a 30 hour a week job!  But, as I’ve said about my own situation in the past, being a ho is a full time job…


Dang, that rant seriously ran over my 6 minutes!  Uhhh…I think that will have to do for now.  I should be at work Monday.  So, barring rain, computerus interruptus (aka computer cock blocking…literally…I don’t use my computer if Manjina is in his bedroom!), or the boss sending me to town, I should be on here.  Fingers crossed!  🙂

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How many times can you put the words “weekend update” into a post title?  Eh…

First, I want to say “Howdy ya’ll!”  🙂  I miss getting online.  😦  And some quick comments on the past 2 posts:  I’m happy to report that Pascal is as perky as ever, but I’m keeping an even better eye on him which disturbs most of the people around here since I’m already a crazy dog lady.  Kat, what’s wrong with having sex while Big Bird bounces around in your head?  lol I can’t even blame it on the kids because they don’t watch Sesame Street.  And, Ron, I quite like that moniker “MacGyver of decorating” if I start a new blog that shall be the title!  🙂


So what have I been up to?  No.  Really.  I can’t remember it all.  It’s a big blur. 


But there are a few standouts like meeting Sanjaya!!!!  Ok, so it was really Bell’s new guy/friend (why can’t kids these days even commit to a title for their significant other?  oh yeah…it’s not just the kids…why can’t we bring back “going steady”?).  I love this boy…despite his Flock of Seagulls hairdo.  Paladin had paying jobs for the teenagers this weekend and Martian did some leaf raking while Bell and Sanjaya2 cleaned the van.  That sweet boy wouldn’t take the money.  Now, we’re going to have to wait until he isn’t looking to slip it into his pocket!  And, Sanjaya2 would NOT let me do the dishes if he was in the house.  I wish to trade any one of Paladin’s kids for him.  Well, except Indy.  She’s mine.  I’m claiming her! 


Speaking of being claimed, Savvy came off with quite a few gems this weekend.  I was in the kitchen making dinner Friday when she came in to tell me all about God.  In her book, he’s something like the Easter bunny, Santa, and mummies all combined.  Sadly, she whispered to me “But don’t tell Dad or he’ll get mad.”  I set her straight immediately.  Yes, Paladin HATES that she’s become completely entranced by Jesus, but, as I’ve told him, the best thing you can do is try to give her a balance of beliefs not just yours or mine or her mother’s church’s (Mull isn’t a true believer of any sort but I’ll get to that in a minute) or any other single viewpoint.  Over time, we all must choose for ourselves and it’s likely that her beliefs will change as she ages.  After I explained to her that it was ok to talk to Dad about God, she sat on the sofa telling him all about it.  Later, she drew him a picture of the two of them holding hands with “I heart Jesus” and “I heart God” and “I heart Dad” in the clouds above them.  How sweet is that?  She has been really sweet these last two weekends now that she understands the boundaries and that time-out will be enforced (Indy got 2 this weekend…in fact, she was the only kid that got one…of course, they consisted of me sitting her on her bed and telling her to say “sorry” and she could go back and play…it seriously cut down on her crying jags).  I’m glad I took your advice and let Paladin have his way.  Although, hand-to-ass is a lot quicker, and as I told my little Borrowed Girls (the youngest 3: Savvy, Blondie, and Indy) Sunday when I took them to Walmart, it’s not off the table.  Savvy didn’t need it, but that didn’t mean that she didn’t drive me nuts. 


Friday night, Savvy did not sleep the entire night; hence, neither did I.  About 1:30am she came in our room.  Then, she came in again at 2:45am, and by 4am, I gave up and got up with her (Paladin took her back to bed the first 2 times, but if I get a couple of hours of sleep and someone wakes me, I’m up for hours).  Sitting in a cold office chair while you make an 8yr. old keep their head on the pillow until they pass out at 5:30am isn’t as fun as it sounds.  At 7am, she came in and woke us up for the morning (did I mention that Mull filled her full of candy before she dropped them off? this makes twice she’s done that…one of these days I’m going to send them home with a bag of candy as big as their heads!).  I got a grand total of 3 hours of sleep and by Saturday night, I wasn’t having any of it.  I made Blondie and Savvy keep their heads down “or else” while I read their bedtime story (here’s a note: today’s kids don’t seem to enjoy Hans Christian Anderson unless he’s dumbed down for them…I loved the originals as a kid…it’s sad), and a semi-decent night’s sleep was had by the adults.  Well, it would have been except for a conversation with Savvy as we were kissing them goodnight.  I was extremely stern while reading to them (I wanted it clear that we were sleeping tonight!), and as I was kissing Savvy goodnight I said to her happily, “Goodnight my darling!”  She looked really confused for a second and then said to me, “Why did you call me ‘your darling’?”  I said the same thing as I kissed Blondie, btw.  But I told her, “Because you are my darlings; just like Dad is my darling.”  Savvy replied, “Is it because this summer I get to come and live with you and be your daughter?”  My heart broke a little when she said that.  I have been there when kids tell their mother that they want to live with Dad, and it’s horrific.  Savvy had obviously said something like that to Mull because Friday night Savvy and Blondie were telling me that “Mom says if you live with Dad you have to take all your stuff and you can’t ever come back.”  I knew Bell was in the kitchen listening and I told Savvy that she wouldn’t be my daughter until Dad and I were married and that was a long time from now.  Savvy seemed satisfied with that and went to sleep.  Paladin was less satisfied, however.


We spent at least 2 hours talking Saturday night after the kids were in bed.  Paladin asked me how I felt having Savvy say that she wanted to be my daughter.  Is “abject fear” the right answer?  Out of the many revelations that spew from Savvy and occasionally Blondie’s mouths in any given weekend, there are usually a couple about Mull.  I won’t lie.  I fish these kids sometimes.  But, I usually don’t have to.  Friday, they told me that Miss Churchlady would pick them up because “Mom has to take Jeremy back to school in Texas.”  They also told me that “Jeremy is going to be staying weekends with us now” and “Justin and Mom go to his friends house.”  Now let me get this straight for you the reader:  ONE WEEK and ONE DAY after giving BIRTH, Mull is seeing 2 men…one for during the week and one for the weekends!  Not to mention that the weekender is aparently in college and doesn’t drive!  Mull is 35!  Remember me saying I’d give it 6 months until she was knocked up again?  I’d like to lower that to 3…way better odds.  I was under the stupid impression that the whooha needs a little time to get back into place after giving birth.  Much of our adult time Saturday night was spent talking about just how many chances Mull is going to get before we take the kids from her.  It’s not just that she’s a total whore.  Hey, she is for all intents and purposes free and single (emphasis on the free).  She has from what I understand been a “passable” mother as in she didn’t let them die and made sure that someone cooked for them (not her mind you…it used to be Paladin and now Martian has to do it all) and paid them some attention.  I don’t know how much of that is true these days.  I’ve been in the “men coming out my ears” stage and it’s not that easy to keep up with everything.  The kids are obviously where things are sliding.  I didn’t even open it up for discussion when I found out about Miss Churchlady.  I told Paladin flat out that was NOT HAPPENING.  If Mull can’t get off her back and pick the kids up, we can get them to school.  He informed her of this and guess who managed to make it back from Texas in time to pick up her kids?  Uh huh…  As I said before, Mull is not a true believer.  The church has become her way of getting others to do her bidding.  And one of the reasons Savvy has become obsessed with church is because that’s where she’s getting ‘good attention’ instead of just being told what to do and to stay out of the way; it’s obvious that the only place these kids are getting attention is when they are at church or with us.  I’m hoping that Paladin will ease up his objections toward church over time because of this.  He did meet the Youth Pastor this weekend (Bell and Sanjaya2 were picked up by the pastor for church and youth group on Sunday which meant we got up at 7am again…grrr…) and I’ve been adamant about him being helpful toward the church.  He doesn’t have anything against this church but he’s worried about impressionable Savvy.  Frankly, I want these church members to understand that we are not Mull’s enemies (which from experience we know is the impression she’s giving them…the kids have said many times that “mom is poor because dad is rich”…ummm…we’re doing ok, but we still have to watch things…Mull CHOSE this…and if she thinks she’s poor now, wait until that extra $600 stops coming after the court hearing).  I had to set Martian and Bell straight about Miss Churchlady picking them up.  It is NOT HAPPENING EVER.  I framed it in a “it’s not a good idea from a legal standpoint because of chain of custody” way but I also made sure that they knew what we had told Mull:  It’s NEVER a problem for us to have extra time with them and we are happy to keep them ANYTIME and we can get them to school too.  I also made sure they understood that we don’t have anything in the world against Miss Churchlady.  I’m sure she’s a lovely person and I truly mean that.  I know that both she and the rest of the church mean well.  But, seriously, how long do you go on helping a whore be a whore?  Even in the interest of the kids? 


As part of my “take care of the kids and suck up to the church at the same time” campaign, Friday before the kids got there Paladin and I went around town and picked up some Easter presents for the kids.  He usually gets them candy and a card for holidays, but I begged to get them Easter dresses.  As I told him, it’s one of the few perks that I get as the NQM (or not-quite-mommy).  He reluctantly agreed.  These kids have been wearing the same 3 outfits since I met them in December and Blondie has been wearing some boy’s clothes that were given to Mull.  So, whatever she spent her adoption windfall on (other than a new Playstation controller which was “a gift from the baby” according to Blondie), it wasn’t on the kids.  And, I really can’t stand that they don’t have decent dresses to wear to church and I don’t care one bit that it makes me an old fudy dudy.  So, I picked out 3 pretty pink frocks for my Borrowed Girls and got Martian a couple of cool new t-shirts.  Then came Bell, our goth princess.  How do you pick out an Easter dress for a Goth?  The store made it easy.  There were 2 possible choices to fit “miss tiny ass who eats everything and gains nothing”:  a tiger print tiered ruffled mini-skirt and a spaghetti strapped, empire waisted, sequined silver dress.  We got both, and decided that if she hated the silver, we’d give her the tiger skirt.  But, she loved it!  YAY!  I may not know teens but I do know a little something about fashion!  Fortunately, I knew the little one’s dress sizes and I guessed at Bell’s (a Junior’s Small…I think that’s about a 3?), but I didn’t know their shoe sizes.  So I took my Borrowed Girls to Walmart all by myself on Sunday morning.  We got dress shoes, new underwear and socks (the 2 older girls have had the same 3 pair of undies between them since December…they were stained and had holes starting and they fit them too tightly) and new tennis shoes for Blondie and Savvy (I washed their filthy old ones the night before and Blondie had an “issue” with the insole coming out of her old ones).  Indy got new dress shoes and big girl panties with Cinderella (she pouted a little because she wanted the Dora but they were out in her size…I wasn’t going up a size…I’m sick of this kid’s clothes falling off her!).  And, they were good as gold.  🙂  Bell doesn’t know it but she has shoes too; we’re saving them and her mini-skirt for her birthday present. 


Yeah, there are perks to being the NQM.  I get to be ground zero for the insanity, but I’m well liked by the children.  I get to pick out pretty girly dresses, and talk fashion with teenagers.  I get to pass snotty quips back and forth with Martian.  I get to be Blondie’s “squishy teddy bear”  and help teach her to read (she just turned 6 and I was helping her read a Disney book this weekend…she had a little trouble with bigger words like “replied” but I was really surprised at how well she did for a kindergartener).  I get to teach Indy not to hit or pull hair, and I get to make faces at her smelly feet while I change a rancid “who fed this kid curry?” diaper.  And, I get to teach Savvy that it’s always better to be yourself in pictures because nobody likes a faker:


Note Savvy's fake princess pose.

Note Savvy's fake princess pose.


Borrowed Girls and Pascal butt.


I know, I didn’t password protect them and someday, I’ll probably get my ass handed to me over it.  But I barely get to be online these days which means, it would take a while to get everyone the password and I just don’t have the time to hide this stuff.  Hey, I don’t really want to anyhow.  I’ll take my beating when it comes. 


Speaking of well-deserved beatings, I don’t know if I’ll get to see ya’ll today.  It’s the first of the month and Brian may need me to go to town.  He’s debating it at the moment which is how I got to write this.  I’m hoping that with the family here next week I’ll have more time online.  I took some extra days at work so Tina can go tourist with them which means a greater chance of me seeing ya’ll!  Yay!  See you ASAP!

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